Letter to my twenties: A rant

Everything around you wants you to move. You need to move at 100km/hr to live a fulfilled life. From questions like “What plans do you have for the weekend?” “Do you exercise?” I know an excellent yoga spot you can join.” Any travel plans oh! You should visit __. Let’s not forget the marriage proposals too, I just brought my first house and I just had my first baby. There are times when I want to scream, “Everybody calm down, wait a minute ok?”! “What happened?” I am still struggling to decide what to eat for breakfast and dinner.

I do feel like my body has been on autopilot since COVID and I am starting to enter the pilot seat and see everything that’s happened in my absence. Feels like I have been asleep for a decade. I have moved to another country across the world and it feels surreal. I am often asking myself, how did I get here? Why am I here? What am I doing? In the midst of the rush of questions. I realise I have responsibilities and bills. When did this happen?

Everything is moving too quickly. I would like to move a little slower than everyone.
I always hear the twenties are the best years of your life. I am starting to disagree, the twenties are the hardest years of your life. You literally are fighting for your life. You fight for your dream. The struggle to make your parents happy. Trying to live a fulfilling life. Fighting to see your friends. Struggling to have “self-care”. Trying to be seen and noticed. Fighting to be extraordinary or wasting your life if you aren’t. Fighting to make it all worth it and fighting can be exhausting. However, in the midst of it all, you do get moments to breathe and see the beauty of all of this madness. Still got five years left in my twenties and am interested in where the rollercoaster will take me. Will I slow down and live this slow pace way of life or stay true to the rollercoaster and continue the thrill of not knowing? Will I continue to experience constant anxiety and a mini rush of happiness and adrenaline from doing something else?